June 2010

Vol. XI Issue No. 6 June 2010

Publisher: Marilyn L. Editor: Betty C.

E-mail: mslancelot@cox.net bettyredux@aol.com


SELF-EXCLUSION BENEFITS AND AVAILABILITY Bobbe McGinley, Clinical Director-CEO of ACT Self-exclusion is an arrangement a person who has a gambling problem can make to keep themselves aware of a commitment to abstain from gambling. It is a program that provides a unique gateway to a service, for anyone who thinks they have a gambling problem. Self-exclusion evolved from informal banning procedures used by casinos to evict unruly or unscrupulous patrons. Self-exclusion programs have become the predominant harm reduction strategy used by the gambling industry to help problem gamblers limit losses. Under this program, individuals who believe they have a problem can voluntarily enter into an agreement with the casino and/or state regulators authorizing the gambling staff to deny them access to the venue. If they are detected on the premises, the gambler agrees to be physically removed and possibly charged with trespass. Nominated periods of self-exclusion vary from one (1) year to five (5) years to ten (10 years). Self-exclusion can be used for those needing to put the brakes on an increasingly bad habit, to those with a serious compulsive addiction. This is a system to signup, and it does not require anyone to enter a casino. Regarding Arizona casinos, any concerned gambler can download the “self-exclusion” form from the internet at www.problemgambling.az.gov, fill it out, have it notarized and returned to the Department of Gaming. Another opportunity available is for a person to make an appointment at the Department of Gaming (phone numbers and address are listed on the web site) to complete the entire process in their office. Support about his huge undertaking is also provided. Many other states provide similar opportunities. The information received directly from the Department of Gaming will clearly inform the concerned gambler about their commitment to self-exclude, and once it is completed this cannot be rescinded, altered or revoked; there is no process in place to do so. Something else worth mentioning is casinos are obligated to take reasonable steps, once a self-excluded person is identified, to promptly escort them out of the casino. It is my experience the very young individual who may think problems could arise in the future, are not going to readily see self-exclusion as a possible deterrent for them. Senior gamblers. . . Older adult problem gamblers will benefit from this process as well, especially if there are some identifying characteristics of the older adults who not only frequent various gambling settings but are likely to develop problems. It would be important to identify the interplay of those individual characteristics with psychosocial and ecological variables that may play a role in determining the frequency and problem severity of gambling behavior. Casinos provide both entertainment and a potential venue for social support. Ecological factors such as the increasing availability and acceptability of gambling opportunities may also play a role in the rising levels of participation among a subgroup of older adults; including those involved in senior centers and congregate living, which have ready access to bingo games and casino trips. To minimize potential harm, it is necessary to evaluate other characteristics of older adults who self-identify as problem gamblers. A tailored intervention and self-excluding may prove to be most effective. The last point is to put emphasis on the word self. It is the concerned problem gambler’s ultimate responsibility to see the self-exclusion process as an additional benefit to recovery and not hold the casino responsible for their personal decisions.

SHE BETS HER LIFE by Mary Sojourner


I’ve been clean a little over a year. It took me at least ten years of working at and not working at my recovery to reach this point. It was only as I researched my new memoir/self-help guide, She Bets Her Life: a true story of gambling addiction that I finally understood what had been a big part of my on again, off again approach to getting clean. Understanding Post Acute Withdrawal has made it easier to recognize the inner warning system that tells me I need to dig a little deeper into my recovery! …when I read about post acute withdrawal on a Victoria, Canada, Gamblers Anonymous site, missing pieces of a puzzle I’d never been able to solve fell into place. All of us who battle our compulsions and addictions talk about how easy it is to slip back into using—the recidivism rate for recovering gambling addicts is higher than that for any other addiction. We know, too, how hard it is to live clean. We can get blindsided by feelings that other people seem to take for granted. While I have come to understand the power of triggers, of euphoric recall, of a “disease that tells me it is not a disease,” I have never fully accepted the depth and persistence of my mood swings—and the even-more-painful reality that I cannot seem to sustain ordinary happiness or remain interested in a loving relationship once it stabilizes. Understanding post acute withdrawal has given me a new way to be with who I am. According to the GA Victoria website, post acute withdrawal can occur randomly at any time in recovery. It is hard to identify because it is not dependent on length of recovery. A ten-year-clean gambling addict can be plagued by it as much as the newly abstinent. While it can occur in connection with underlying psychological conditions like depression, bipolar, OCD, and other personality disorders, it is often misdiagnosed as one or more of those “illnesses.” The website reads: “Often a deep emotional low occurs shortly after some pleasant experience like a good vacation, a promotion at work, a well deserved achievement or honor. The low is a baffling experience and is usually the point where the member goes back to the addiction, explodes uncontrollably or goes into a deep depression and is misdiagnosed.” When I read these words, I saw the template of decades of my life. I’ve used something—anything—to distract myself since I first discovered food and books when I was five or six. It’s always been true that I need a good book to read in order to go to sleep, and when I don’t have one or more of them I feel jittery. I’ve been an addict all my life. I’ve been in withdrawal all my life. Post acute withdrawal is an aftereffect of a true addict’s cycles of using and withdrawing. GA Victoria also discusses the phenomenon of a recovering gambler visiting a casino (not uncommon in areas in which casinos are also music and entertainment venues) and not gambling: “a few days or weeks later the same individual experiences an extreme mood swing—either a high or a low—and is again baffled. The effects of being in the gambling environment actually did trigger a delayed emotional reaction.” Finally, they reminded me that those of us who have used for years don’t know what we feel. They point out that it’s normal to have buildups of feelings—sadness, anger, frustration, anxiety, happiness, contentment, joy. Once the gambling addict is not using, those feelings can be overwhelming. “Reality is not a comfortable place for recovering addicts of any sort,” the site emphasizes. And so, the recovering addict almost always reacts with a relapse of some kind, perhaps not by gambling, but by using any of the multitude of mind-altering substances and behaviors available to any of us.
From She Bets Her Life: a true story of gambling addiction. Now available from bookstores and Seal Press, May 1, 2010 http://shebetsherlife.com/

To whom it may concern:

Marilyn, this is a letter I wrote for a young woman who embezzled $60K from her employer and got caught. I had a bit of a dilemma because, although I believed she was no longer gambling, her attendance at meetings had become sporadic, and she wanted some kind of official "G.A. letter" to vouch for her. So, I figured it was more honest to tell my story and what G.A. has done for me, rather than pretend to know how much recovery she was gaining. I extracted her name and called her “Jane Doe.” After I read it, I was pleased because it conveys what I truly believe can happen for any woman who stays in G.A. My kids got their mom back. Love, Linda M.

To whom it may concern: I have been a member of Gamblers Anonymous (“G.A.”) and have abstained from gambling of any kind since September 21, 1981.

There are no “authorities” or official representatives of G.A.Thus, no one is qualified to write letters in an “official capacity” to vouch for other members of the program. Therefore, I write to you as a member of G.A. who has befriended Jane Doe and, hopefully, by sharing a little of my own experience in the program with you, I can convince you to consider the path Jane Doe is on (in Gamblers Anonymous) when you are determining the outcome of her case.

I was a 33 year old mother of three working for a major financial institution when I came to Gamblers Anonymous. I had been spending almost as much time gambling over the previous three years as I spent at my job and very little time nurturing my children. I was so addicted to gambling that I didn’t believe I had any choice but to live the way I was living. I came to G.A. in serious debt, living in an abusive marriage and emotionally overwrought. I did not see any way out. A series of events took place that caused me to seek help, and I did. I went to Gamblers Anonymous. The people there helped me to understand that none of my other problems could be solved unless I stopped gambling. They explained over a period of time (while I abstained from gambling) what I needed to do to get better. The primary ingredient in my recovery was regular attendance at G.A. meetings--not fewer than three meetings per week.

In 1981 my children were 12, 6 and 5 years old. I believe that my children were returned to me by the program of Gamblers Anonymous. All three are productive members of society today in part because their mother was rescued from the dregs in time to actually become a good, nurturing parent. My story is not an uncommon one among women compulsive gamblers who stay in the program and raise their children in recovery.

I was at Jane Doe’s second G.A. meeting and have seen her on most Friday nights over the past 6 plus months. Although I, fortunately, did not wind up in the same legal situation as Jane Doe, I truly believe it was just a matter of time, had I continued to gamble, before I would have jeopardized my job and freedom to feed my gambling addiction. I know that Jane Doe is a parent also, and this letter is more for her son’s benefit than hers.

I would humbly ask the Court to consider what I have written and what has been revealed by mental health care professionals in their studies of compulsive gambling – that this is a psychological disorder–when sentencing Jane Doe. Thank you.

Sincerely,
Linda M., CA

The intent of Women Helping Women is to support and inform women in recovery from a gambling addiction. The opinions offered by lay-people as well as professionals are based on their own experience and research and may not reflect the opinions of the editors.



Gripped by Gambling http://www.grippedbygambling.com

There have been many times in the past where I have been guilty of procrastination. Even today, I see little glimpses of this lazy pattern. Procrastination is a behavior in which we postpone actions or tasks to a later time. This behavior becomes our coping mechanism to avoid beginning a task or completing one, and may delay making decisions. It can even be disguised under different labels such as “It’s not my job,” “I did it the last time,” or “How come it’s always me?”

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